Having a great memory can also be a curse

Memory Comic

Many people have told me they wish their memory could be better. I tell them to be glad it isn’t.

What people don’t realize who ask for this is that there are people who have good memories and they regret having it. I have a great memory and I often wish I could forget what I have learned.

Memory Comic
memory comic

Why? First, not every memory is pleasant. For most of my life, I randomly remembered things each day that weren’t ideal and uncomfortable emotionally—Times where the situation was not helpful for those involved. I don’t regret the choices that other people made, it was their life, it was just like watching a car crash you know will happen but can’t avoid.

Second, not every memory is helpful. Many memories have facts that don’t help you or anyone. Too often in the news I read things that are sad and tragic and while I regret that others treat others badly I wish I didn’t find new ways in which people can be cruel to others. I don’t like violence, and I don’t like cruelty. Too often we have become normalized to that, and that doesn’t help anyone.

Third, when the memory reappears multiple times it is annoying and boring. I have new things that I want to think about. Not other people’s poor decisions from the past. You have to let the mistakes of how people treat you go. Not because they deserve it, but because you deserve it. You deserve to own what is happening in your mind and be happy.

What is the downside of having a good memory? All of the things above. You don’t have to remember things with Google so close. It’s nice but memory now is a luxury, and I can see that it is a luxury many people don’t want to afford.

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