I read something once that said that people are more motivated by fear of loss than gain. I believe that is true.
Whenever I write something about loss, it gets tons of views. A recent post about People who tell on others at work got lots of views. I say this because normally I write about things from a positive point of view. It has been my experience that whatever you focus on in life you get more of.
My daily life has been challenged in the past by the circumstances of my life, but I always had hope. Hope that no matter how dark life felt, tomorrow would be a better day. Annie the movie was so profound for me. Tomorrow was not always better, but it was different, and that was enough.
When I talk with people about life they often say they don’t want to change their life because of their fear of loss. Fear of losing their job, relationship, or whatever no matter how much it hurts more than helps them. I have realized that losing is often a false idea. Losing allows possibilities to happen that are greater and better than we could conceive of our own.
For example, I had a 5-year relationship with a woman and I thought we were going to be married. However things didn’t work out, and now I am happier than I would have been if it had worked out. Another example. I didn’t get a job that I thought would be perfect for me, and I found a better job instead.
Have I had a real loss in my life? Yes of course. However, it has given me an appreciation and ability to emphasize with lots of people. I have been able to relate to others in a way that surprises me more people don’t seem to value. I can listen and identify with people because of those difficulties.
If all we do is win, we are hardly fit to be human. Losing makes us more human than winners.