I discovered the concept of Fair Fighting yesterday and I wanted to share it with you.
Here are the rules:
- Before you begin, ask yourself why you feel upset.
- Discuss one topic at a time.
- No degrading language.
- Express your feelings with words.
- Take turns speaking.
- No stonewalling.
- No yelling.
- Take a time-out if things get too heated.
- Attempt to come to a compromise or an understanding.
These are all helpful when you discuss with someone. Here are a few more rules that I like to do that seem to help difficult conversations.
- Go first at apologizing.
- Be the bigger person and forgive.
- Remember their positive qualities.
- Be affectionate and kind.
- Try to laugh at the silliness when you recognize it.
- Be aware of being a hypocrite.
- Don’t try to win or worry about losing. Those are meaningless.
- Seek for win/win.
- Look long term
- Remember they are part of your human family.
I learned this from All in the Family. A 50-year-old show that still has relevant things to share. I love it.