One of the difficult things in life is to learn to believe someone’s behavior and not their words.
We are trained to see communication as the fundamental way we understand others. The problem is that not everyone wants to be honest, and some people are so confused that what they say isn’t what they really feel and think.
We see this all the time. We see people who say that they value the law, but then ignore the law when it doesn’t suit them. What we need to do is to ignore what people say and evaluate someone based on their actions and the concrete things they do.
I rarely say things because I know that the best example is just living a peaceful and joyful life. People who are hurting say all kinds of garbage, and often the most vocal and communicative people are the most screwed up. They need others’ affirmations because they feel terrible about themselves.
Look at the people who are secretly peaceful and joyful. Ask them why they feel that way and you will generally grow and learn as a person. Thoughtful people aren’t hard to find. We are just used to giving attention to people who are loud and obnoxious.
Many people said they loved me, but then did things that hurt me and were selfish. A selfish love isn’t love. Love that says “Do something for me and you will be loved in return” is just manipulation. Love is when you want and help people become the most peaceful and happy versions of themselves. Be someone who can leave the world a better place not because of the words you write, but because of the lives you have changed.