I am curious. I want to understand things as much as possible.
It also helps me to better understand the interactions that I had with people in the past. This probably sounds strange, but I love them more knowing how much internal BS they were dealing with.
For example, yesterday I watched two Mormon women who are now ex talk about the pressure they felt in the church to be what they church wanted them to be.
As I was listening I knew some of those things, but I didn’t realize other things. I didn’t understand how excruciating the body image is for young women, and why this is so painful for them.
I wasn’t thrilled with my body image growing up, but I never had it define me the way I heard these women feel it defined them. For example they talked about how when they were children they were taught modesty because if they weren’t modest they would cause Mormon men to think of them in impure ways. Why weren’t Mormon men responsible for their own actions?
So as a kid they were told if their clothing was too sexual, and then later forced to wear garments for spiritual protection. Mormon people believe that wearing garments protect them spiritually. Its hard to believe. When non Mormon things have an evil influence, then the world is scary.
These women talked about how they felt ugly, even though they were not overweight, and one of them was blonde. One of them talked about getting breast implants because she felt that she was too small, even though she was an Ex-Mormon. She took accountability and said that she still needed therapy. I would have done the therapy before I put some grapefruits in my chest.
Utah is #6 in the number of plastic surgeons. That is just sick to me. When Mormon women are told to marry young (as young as possible and legal), and have lots of children and still be attractive what choice do they have but plastic surgery. The other influencer admitted to using Botox. Disgusting. They said that they may not have the audience they do if they weren’t attractive. Which is clearly not true because one of them does a podcast and she clearly has peoples attention.
This goes back to people believing what they need to believe because they haven’t had therapy. Once you talk about your thoughts, you realize they are mistakes and you get clarity on your life.
I never made a woman body an issue in my respect to her. If I was a woman, I would want to be respected for my mind and that what I always connected with. I remembered peoples interests, values and spoke to what they cared about. When you don’t have the ability to connect with someone with your mind, your body is a poor substitute for connection.
I loved the people in my life as much as I could. I valued and respected them and nothing they did to their body changed that. I had a gf once who had plastic surgery before I meet her. I did not find her fake body parts to be attractive. I told her that she was a beautiful black woman and that the kind of man she wants doesn’t care about her body. I hope one day when she takes them out, she will leave them out.
The only people who need plastic surgery are people who are functionally helped by it due to an accident or perhaps a genetic condition. Women please, don’t go under the knife. Men love you for what is inside, we don’t love plastic. Those who do are sick and you don’t need those men in your life.
If your value to your community is your looks, what a sad community to be a part of.