In order to discover things to improve about yourself, you need to step back and look at yourself like others see you.
How can you do this? It helps if you have acted and can act in a role that isn’t you and see how different who you are from the role you play. It can also help if you have had therapy and worked though the junk you have believed. It helps if you have a wise friend who reflects the best part of you back to you.
Ultimately however you need to take the feedback that some people have given you and try to imagine you are the person giving the feedback. Is there truth in what they are saying?
For example, in my case sometimes the feedback I have been given is that I am oversensitive and need to get a thicker skin and not be bothered with things. I know that the people who have told me this said in with positive and good intentions and I appreciated their kindness, but it doesn’t help to tell an HSP not to be an HSP.
They didn’t know I was an HSP. At that time I didn’t know I was an HSP. I just knew that I was sensitive and that conversation didn’t help my anxiety.
People can have good intentions and care about you, but few are able to actually help you. Too many people have their own issues to deal with, and it makes it difficult to truly heal and help others. I have meet a few people in my life who healed me with their friendship, like my mentors and others and I value them the most.
Not everyone is as fortunate as I was. That’s part of the reason why I write here. To share the insights I have learned from others. Those mentors helped me to see how others perceive me, and accept that being quirky and myself is ok and valued. It is hard to value yourself when others don’t always make that obvious.
By looking at yourself from others point of view you can consider if there are things that need to improve, or if the issue is theirs and their responsibility to fix. We get stuck on our limited viewpoint, and need to consider others viewpoints as well.