Unfortunately in my life, some people have tried to take advantage of me. I had to confront them about this.
One example happened when I was dating. I met a woman from a dating site and she seemed normal and nice and I invited her to a date. When she arrived she had her young daughter with her. She didn’t say she had a daughter on her profile, and since the daughter was about 8 or so it wasn’t something that I could ignore. I gulped when I saw this and wasn’t sure what the kind and respectful thing to do was.
I had to confront her on this. I said that you lied to me and I don’t expect a first date to be with a child even if you have one. I think we went to McDonalds when I was expecting to go to a nice restaurant with her. I was so disappointed not only in her but myself. I should have asked if she had a child, and from then on it was part of my standard phone conversations.
Another example was a customer that I had. He tried to take advantage of me by not paying for what I had done by claiming that I couldn’t fix a problem that was in addition to the original problem that I had fixed. I asked him for some patience and we had been making progress on getting that problem fixed with the strategy I was doing. I told him that if I couldn’t fix it, then he wouldn’t pay me for this part of my work. I was able to fix the second issue, and I asked to be paid in full.
People often ask for things that are not reasonable or fair to you. You have to value your time and knowledge and respect yourself. Being kind isn’t just about making others feel good and being helpful. It is also making yourself feel good and respecting the effort you put into your life. I once had someone tell me that salary is just your self-esteem. I agree with that. That’s why I won’t even consider salaries that I haven’t made for years. I am not becoming less valuable with time, I have become more valuable and the same is true for you.
Don’t go backward in life. Confront people who attempt to use you.