People love to tell others what to do. Often they are well-intentioned but ignorant.
All of my life I have had well-intentioned people tell me what I should do. I listened and thanked them for their concern, but it didn’t help me and it doesn’t help you.
You can have the most understanding person listen to you and you can ask them for advice, but ultimately you understand your life better than anyone else. Doing what others tell you to do, without thinking it through is just a way to avoid responsibility for your decisions.
Why am I saying this? I saw a LinkedIn post in which the person said that when you are looking for a job you shouldn’t share your frustration in looking for a job. That is a should that isn’t nuanced, but clearly black and white. There is no case in which that person thinks its appropriate. And there is no case in which sharing your feelings may be inappropriate.
Life is about nuance. People love to tell others what they should do, when they don’t take their own advice. This is not about being hypocrites but about the moral flexibility people who want others to conform their own moral beliefs have. You can bet that when they are under pressure, now its their situation and not their character they are worried about.
If someone tells you what you should do, they are speaking from a place of ego and not wisdom. Wisdom doesn’t tell people what they should do. It helps them understand why they may want to do something and the cost and benefit of it. Coersion is should, wisdom is possibilities.