Looking Back by Keane ft. K’naan

You always have your mind on something else the song says echoing what was said to Luke. “Never your mind on the present. Always your mind on something else.”

It is remarkable how often we think about the past. I know that not only myself, but when I talk to others they live as though the past is their only experience. For example, today people complained about the past but we can only address things in the present and take it from there.

If you pay attention to the chatter your mind is always saying, it is remarkable how difficult it is to stay in the present. Even when we think we are listening, I find myself sometimes distracted by my thoughts. It really is hard work to listen and I find that few people are good at it.

I am not claiming I am good at listening, but I do get told I am a good listener. However it really takes effort to hold back your thoughts and feelings, and listen to someone else. I think with practice it gets easier to look at something from someone else point of view.

I think that when we constantly repeat things in our head like our past experiences, we distort them. This is proved scientifically that the act of remembering distorts memories. Emotions really twist the reality of what happened, so I rarely trust my memories anymore. If someone for example claims that I was a jerk I tend to believe them, and apologize rather than try to remember if I was a jerk or not. If i wasn’t a jerk and I apologize then things are better. If I was a jerk and apologize, that is my duty. Either way an apology is appreciated.

Being right doesn’t matter, and looking back doesn’t help you.